Saturday, November 21, 2009

Bonsignore Citizens Brigade: Hawks @ Oilers


I had a dream last night, and for the first time in a while this dream did not involved me waking up stuck to my sheets. I was suited up for the mighty copper and blue, and I think we were playing the Av's or something, but we weren't in Rexall nor the Pepsi Center. It looked more like the Kinsmen or something. Anyway our team was getting destroyed, we couldn't get anything going whatsoever, half the team couldn't skate, and to top it all off the refs were absolutely busting our balls with horrific calls. I'm getting more and more frustrated as the game goes on. My next shift out I get sprung on a break away from the blue line in, make a decent move, and put a backhander just inside the far post. So I'm excited because not only did I score, but I thought that maybe this could spark a come back (although I have no idea what the score was, but I'm pretty sure we were losing, by a lot). So as I'm celebrating the ref skates over and starts waving the goal off. What the fuck? That was clearly in, I scream at him. He just keeps waving his arms and saying the puck never crossed the line. So at this point I've had it. As I'm about to skate off I start ripping off my equipment and throwing it all over the ice in frustration. And then the dream ends, when the phone rings. What does this dream mean? I have no idea. What do I look like a fruity doctor? All I know is that I have a sinking feeling that that dream was a bad omen for tonight's tilt against the Blackhawks.

I don't know if anyone watched TSN Thursday night hockey, but if you didn't you missed a couple doozies. The Leafs lost once again, and it cemented my theory that God hates the Leafs. How else could you explain the phantom high stick call, followed by late game heroics from Erik Cole (thanks asshole), and an absolute bed shitting by the Leafs in the shootout? Though I still think it's funny when the Leafs lose I can't laugh about it anymore, because what's the point really? Their season is already over and we're barely a month in.

Anyway back to the topic at hand, the second half of the double header that night featured the Flames going up against the red hot Blackhawks. Everyone was expecting this to be a solid battle between two teams near the top of the conference. Thankfully though the Flames are getting a little karma payback for that whole H1N1 thing, and got raped by the Hawks, landing them their second loss in a row. This game wasn't even close. The Flames were getting out hit, out played, out shot, out goaltended, out fought, everything. Dion Phaneuf had a particularly shitty game, which means hopefully he's sliding further and further down the list of Team Canada hopefuls. Brent Seabrook on the other hand had a great game. See you in Vancouver Brent!

Why is this important? Well for one anytime Calgary loses is a moral boost for Oiler faithful, especially when they get decimated harder than Hiroshima. But more importantly I hope this means the Hawks have used up most of their goal scoring magic for this road trip. They scored 7 goals, their arms have to be a little tired right? Who am I kidding, as long as the Oilers can avoid another 11-1 fiasco like last year I think that's a moral victory.

Our boys have been playing pretty good hockey over the last 4 games, capping it off with a big win over NW leading impostors Colorado. The rest of this home stand, however, doesn't get any easier. Every team that rolls through winter wonderland over the next week are above Edmonton in the standings, by at least 4 points, and are just generally better teams. If the Oilers can rally tonight and steal a win, hopefully that will get the ball rolling and we can finally make up a little ground and catch up with the rest of the conference.

jeanshorts prediction: Oilers 4 - Hawks 3. BOOK IT!

GOILERS!

IQWT!

-jeanshorts

72 Say Your Piece:

  1. OK god dammit. I've been waiting a while now to try to make sure I'm not the loser who posts first. And yet here I am. The loser who posts first.

    Other than the shock of a BM (theoretically - it might be Dakin or JS ghosting for all I know) extended holiday update post, what will shock me more is if the Oilers win this bitch. Having said that, I will offer up a 5-3 Oilers win prediction.
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  2. I do the same thing on the Nation, espeically when Brownlee posts something at like 11 pm Alberta time. I don't want to look like all I do is sit at my computer and wait for new articles, although I'm not denying that, but it just seems to happen that I am on the computer 75% of the time a new article pops up.
    Luckily for me though people actually post comments on the Nation so I can get away with waiting a bit.

    I do like our little 5 man parties on here though.
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  3. Okay, so am I officially not a pussy if I was really shocked by Baggedmilk's post?

    I'm going with an 8-3 Oilers victory. After reading about people bitching about Hemsky, I think he's due for a 'fuck you' game.
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  4. No, you get a pass. Even I was like yeeeeesh for some of it. Though not surprised by any of it.

    The hilarious thing is if Hemsky has another 5 point game tonight those exact same guys will be like "Hemsky should be captain! Quinn is a dick for yelling at him!"
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  5. So I haven't read about people dissing Hemsky yet. Just caught up and this article and A FUCKING POST FROM BM???? jesus it must be Saturday. I'l be back. I may go on a killing spree to avenge my beloved.
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  6. Brownlee, among others, shut them down pretty quick.

    It was basically 3 or 4 assholes that have never said anything on the site before I dont think.
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  7. Nope its on the Oilers site now.

    WE ARE FUCKED.

    So I'm changing my game score prediction to:

    "Chicago gets anything less than 10 and it'll be a moral victory".
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  8. Where the fuck did they find this guy? What happened to Dubnyk? God dammit sometimes this team is the equivalent of Britney Spears going crazy and shaving her head.
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  9. Khabby tweaked his back today, so unfortunately that's not enough time to call up an actual goalie. It's like that time that kid from the UofA dressed as a backup for a game.
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  10. Khabby hurt himself in practice today, and apparently Springfield is like 2 galaxies past the milky way. Dubnyk wouldn't have made it in time.
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  11. Sorochan, right? You know, they should throw Joey in there one night. What the fuck, right? I'll bet he's better in his own zone than Gilbert.
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  12. OILERS FUCKING HOCKEY!!!

    I think Floyd Whitney should get the start, because really, will it make a difference? FUCK YOU JDD.
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  13. So is there really only one more HNIC game for the Oilers for the rest of the season? What the fuck man. Shouldn't all the Canadian teams play on Saturday night?
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  14. *slaps David S in the back of the neck with wang for not forgetting about him*
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  15. Sorry js, everyone knows that Canada demands quality Leaves action eleventeen more times this season. Regional equality, bitches!
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  16. I've gotten over the Leafs being on every Saturday. I grew up with it that way, and it's the only way CBC makes any money.
    But what is going to be the second half of the double header for the rest of the year? Vancouver at Minnesota?
    I just read an article about how tons of bars here have started showing UFC over Canuck games. So I mean clearly there's a market outside of Alberta that's hungry for Saturday night games on TV.
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  17. Librarian Mike - glad to see your migration here. I like the cut of your jib, son.
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  18. Oh yeah js, I don't give a shit how much your old man loves those losers, I DEMAND UNRELENTING VENOM when referring to that cursed team. 3 wins in 20? Too many, says I! Just like the Flames and Canucks, FUCK 'EM.
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  19. *jerks off on Dakin's kid's clean laundry for no apparent reason*

    Back online fuckers! Woooo! MacBook!!!!
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  20. For some reason, all of a sudden the back of my head feels like it has warm jelly-like drippings on it.

    *Reaches around back of his head. Looks at hand.*

    What. The. Fuck.
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  21. Thankfully my dad is only a fairweather fan at best. He'll watch hockey if it's on, but he doesn't follow it like we do. My best friend out here though, that's a whole nother story. I bust his balls all the time about the Leafs.
    Although I'm starting to become way too soft, since not only does he have to hear it from garbage Canuck fans that didn't start watching hockey until Luongo showed up, but he's legitimately depressed about how horrible their season is, so I'm starting to feel sorry for him.
    Still though, at the end of the day the more the Leafs lose, the better I feel.

    Now if only the Canucks would start losing just as bad.
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  22. Cheers, Poo Czar.

    I actually like watching the Leafs knowing they're more than likely to get hockey's equivalent of the dirty sanchez on a weekly basis.
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  23. If you think that's bad, you should see l'il Dakin's stack of onesies. Glazed like a rack of honey crullers.
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  24. *pushes away box of 'honey dip' Timbits*
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  25. By definition, you can't technically rape the willing. Librarian Mike for the ruling?

    And besides, it was really more of an informal greeting than anything untoward.
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  26. Y'know what irks me about leaf fans? Ever seen anything other than Sundin, Clark, Potvin or Lindros (?) on the back of a jersey? When I see some poor bastard rocking a Mike Palmateer jersey, he'll get a high five.

    I love seeing random 3rd line Oilers from years past represented on jerseys. So damn good.
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  27. It's way fucking worse out here. All you see is Sedin, Luongo, Bieksa or Kesler. And if it's a Linden it's the new jersey from the last 2 years.

    Where the fuck are the Odjick fans at????? Hell I'd settle for a fucking Bure. Seriously, not one Bure jersey out here. It's insane. They might as well not have even had a team prior to the lockout.
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  28. What about Harold Snepts? I seem to remember that he was fucking LOVED. I'm not sure why though, as he was kind of like Ethan Moreau without all the talent.
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  29. Yeah, for some reason Snepsts number isn't hanging beside Smyl's and 14 NW Division title banners.
    You know your team has no heritage when.......
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  30. I'm watching the Leafs/Capitals game. I realize I'm stating the obvious, but man is Tim Hunter one ugly motherfucker.

    *gets hard watching Ovechkin on the powerplay*
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  31. He's standing in the ACC, but I'm pretty sure the tip of his nose is somewhere in Simco.
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  32. Why are you guys all here on a Saturday night? Fuck.


    Poo Czar: my kid never had clean clothes. That's to classy.


    JS: your best friend isn't Baggedmilk?
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  33. Oh wait... None of you are here anymore. Well now I'm going to jerk off in all of your seats.
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  34. Visnovski!!!!!! What are you doing?
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  35. Thank fuck I have this UFC to numb the fucking god damn mother fucking ahit whore pain in the ass of an OIlers game.
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  36. That call lines right up with the McGoo call. Fuck sakes that is bullshit.
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  37. Just got back from dinner. How's the game...oh fuck. Well, I can't say I'm surprised. Anything interesting happening?
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  38. Hey, Rapestache got another goal. Yay!!!
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  39. Anybody think Chicago would be willing to trade captains? Fucks sake Moreau. Fucking retire already.
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  40. How can a goalie who is 6'4 be so fucking shitty upstairs?
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  41. Jung would have made that save.
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  42. Good fuck what happened? Oh. Right. Blackhawks.

    Carry on then.
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  43. Tambo should offer a "My whole roster for your while roster" trade to Chicago. Throw in Dr. Randy Gregg if that helps sweeten the deal.
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  44. It's not even enough to say that Chicago's the better team. It looks like they're from a better league tonight.
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  45. Well, perhaps Mr. Jung brought some o' that good time WHL magic with him.
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  46. I heard that Mrs. Jung doesn't like it in Edmonton.
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  47. Hey Mike, in response to your earlier post, a Vancouver Clown jersey with Snepts on the back would be in my top 5 awesome/ugly jerseys. But I'd have to grow the 'stache first. Counting the 3 weeks into Movemember I should be ready to purchase sometime around summer of 2017.

    Ah. Snepts. The Canucks answer to Glenn Anderson. What a franchise.
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  48. She's just mad that Comrie hasn't tried to fuck her yet.
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  49. HAAAAROOOLD. If he was an Oiler, he'd be Kevin Lowe (I went there).

    Oh, and in response to your earlier post, it's not rape. Bro means Bro.
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  50. I can't wait to see Quinn's press conference. I'm hoping he drags someone out and just beats the shit out of him as a lesson to the others. Who's first in line for a beating? I'm going with el capitane.
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  51. *high fives self, sings praises of Dewey Decimal System*
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  52. haha I was going to start this post with "thank god UFC was on tonight, so I at least had something entertaining to watch tonight while the Oilers game was on" but Dakin beat me to it.

    Ugh. No amount of booze in the world will wash away the stink from that defeat. But I'm going to give it my fucking darndest.

    Like someone said up there, the Hawks looked like a high caliber NHL team while the Oilers brought their Jr. B squad tonight. Fucking garbage.

    At least we didn't get blown out like the Flames.

    Michigan lost today to fucking Ohio State, Oilers lost tonight. If the Cowboys lose tomorrow I'm probably just going to off myself. Either that or stop watching sports on the weekend.

    Jung was easily the best Oiler tonight.
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  53. Fuckin tambo better get off of Lowe's nuts and make bloody trade already. Our backup blows. Our Captain is a cocksucker. O'Sullivan is a gawd damn pussy. And Gilbert's brains are gibbled.
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  54. Oh and, yes, unfortunately baggedmilk is my best friend, yet I still have no idea why I talk to that kid.
    But I'm not a 16 year old girl with one BFFFFFFF. I have a few dudes I'd consider my best friends.

    The End.

    Onto more beer.
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  55. Watch him beat the shit outta Sparky Kulchisky for no reason, just to put everyone on notice.
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  56. js - I can't fathom your love of the Cowboys. They are an "Evil Empire" team. Like the Yankees. As a Dolphins fan I have but 2 words: Leon Lett.

    To be fair, I wouldn't hate seeing a Chicago-Washington Cup Final. Those fucking teams play hockey.

    Stupid Oilers...
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  57. Jung was pretty good. There was one part when Hemsky came to the bench and said to him, "Give me my fucking water you fucking scrub!" and Jung passed it to him like a veteran. Now that's fucking Oilers hockey.
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  58. Having a"best" is singular. You can't have multiple best friends by the very definition. Fuck you. Haha.


    Even the fucking fights sucked tonight. God damn that game was so ugly the bartender at bp's shut it off and I had to beg for them to put it on at least one of the 12 screens.

    Alright boys... It's time we start planning a night out together. We need to get a good drink on for a night. You guys name the time and place and I'm there. JS will be in town soon so I will make a trip down too. Show your faces bitches. I'll buy you one of your favorites.
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  59. I lost the feed to Quinn's presser. It sounded like he just threw the mic on the floor and walked off. Man, he's pissed.

    I'd be up for a night out one of these days. We're having a Librarian Baby here any time now, but I'm pretty sure my wife would let me go out with my 'Oilers Friends' one night.
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  60. Well that was a fuck of a night. Watched the Oilers get their asses kicked at Hudsons. Man the chicks were HOT. But holy shit did that game suck. Not like "if only our... wasn't so weak we'd be right in there". More like "Jesus we suck".

    Looks like you guys had a decent BCB, with strangely little Poo Czar cocksmanship and no pants being flung off. Oh well. Maybe next time.
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  61. JS will be in town soon? DETAILS!
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  62. Fuck I'm hammered. What I meant was, if you guys want to set up a boozer, I'm in.
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  63. Yay BOOZE!!!! Still drunk!!!
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  64. Fuck you Dakin, best can be plural. "Those are the best tits I've ever seen". Not "That's the best tit I've ever seen". PLURAL.

    And yeah, I'm in Alberta from Dec. 21st to Jan. 5th so take time off work accordingly. We'll figure something out closer to that time but we all definitely need to go out and get shitty.
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  65. Not sure you want to use the term "get shitty" with Poo Czar lurking.
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  66. No god dammit! Tits themselves are plural because they come in a pair. So you are speaking about one pair as a singular unit.... therefore, Best pair of tits I've seen. Which would have to be some absolutely amazing tits I would say.

    fuck Hangovers.
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  67. @JS: You're not going to believe this but those are exact days of my time off as well. *makes appointment for waxing*...
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  68. Well, you aren't going to believe this!!!! but.... In that exact set of days off, I happen to have some of those off too! holy fuck.
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